Phantom**
Dir: Kabir Khan
Starring: Saif Ali Khan, Katrina Kaif, Mohammad Zeeshan Ayyub

Phantom is much in the news these days - but more for the furore it’s caused than for any intrinsic merits of its own. The movie’s leading man Saif Ali Khan’s so-called "anti-Pakistan" statements have a whole bunch of people worked up - from Hafiz Saeed to Faysal Qureshi (the self-promoting, self-adoring tv presenter, not the actor) to Shaan Shahid (who has directed his ire at Mawra Hocane for supposedly defending Saif). But nobody has really watched the movie itself.

Well, they needn’t bother. Politically the movie is naïve (if not dangerous for the kind of behaviour it advocates) but politics can always be debated (though how the director Kabir Khan and Saif Ali Khan actually thought that the movie would be allowed to be screened in Pakistani cinemas is beyond me - surely they can’t be that innocent of the ways - and political realities – of the world). What can’t be debated is that this is a mediocre film which for a spy thriller (Saif plays an ex-Indian Army man recruited by RAW to carry out some extra-judicial killings - some within Pakistan itself – of the masterminds behind the 26/11 Mumbai attacks) moves at a snail’s pace and has so many leaps of logic and plot holes that it would try any moderately intelligent person’s patience. Any patience surviving would quickly be suffocated by the jingoistic and maudlin dialogue meant to whip up some emotional patriotism from Indian audiences.

I really expected better from Kabir Khan who generally exhibits a more nuanced understanding of the world. Saif Ali Khan is never convincing and Katrina Kaif’s expressionless mien looks permanently botoxed. Disappointing all around.

Cut to chase: Phantom has no substance.

Entourage ** ½

Devoted fans of the television series - which ran on HBO for 8 seasons - will probably like this big screen adventure of the Hollywood foursome and their various friends, foes and acquaintances which literally picks up where the series ended. But four years have passed for us in the real world and it is a bit disappointing to see that Hollywood superstar Vincent Chase (Adrian Grenier), his best friend and manager Eric (Kevin Connolly), his half-brother Johnny (Kevin Dillon) and his home-boy Turtle (Jerry Ferrara) still stuck in the same old rut. The same holds true for Vincent’s agent Ari Gold (Jeremy Piven), the breakout character from the series. Except for perhaps an illusionary fresh coat of paint we really get nothing new here. It is one long, extended episode of the series (with a lot of the recurring characters from the series also showing up) revolving around Vincent’s attempts at getting additional financing for his maiden directorial venture but it really doesn’t deserve a big screen outing.

Still, there a few nice laughs (mainly courtesy of Ari and Johnny), a few knowing, Hollywood insider jokes, lots of surprise walk-ons from Hollywood celebrities (including Mark Wahlberg whose life inspired the series), and it is always (always!) nice to see more of Emmanuelle Chriqui who plays Sloan, Eric’s ex but soon-to-be baby mama. If you see this as merely an extension of the series then it’s fine. But as a movie it really doesn’t stand up on its own.

Cut to chase: Nice to see these familiar characters again but it’s also the same old, same old.

Kmumtaz1@hotmail.com; Twitter: @KhusroMumtaz