ife has this funny way of balancing itself out. The ups with the downs, the quiet with the noise, and let’s not forget, in relationships, there’s usually one person who’s soft and the other who’s got that no-nonsense edge. In Chinese philosophy, they call it Yin and Yang. The concept is pretty ancient, but honestly, it fits right in with our daily lives, especially if you’ve been on the rollercoaster of relationships, family and work. While my journey towards understanding Yin and Yang wasn’t exactly the “self-help” path I’d have chosen, it ended up being incredibly grounding.

Yin and Yang are opposite forces that when together, make a whole. Imagine Yin as your cool, calm and collected friend — the chilled-out side of things. Yang, on the other hand, is the energetic, fiery one saying, “Do something!” Together, they create this harmony and natural flow that I used to ignore in my life, assuming that I just needed to be one way all the time.

Even in the world of science and technology, the concept of Yin and Yang shows up everywhere. Think about it: at the core of computers, the very devices we rely on daily, everything boils down to binary code — just 0s and 1s. These two opposing symbols, quite like Yin and Yang, represent absence and presence, off and on, forming the foundation of complex systems, algorithms and the digital world we live in. Much like in relationships or life, the balance of opposites is essential here, too. If either 0 or 1 were missing, we’d have no code, no processing and no tech.

This harmony of duality, woven into the heart of our digital reality, is another reminder that opposites don’t just coexist, they also create something powerful and meaningful when balanced. Yin and Yang, once again, prove to be the blueprint for everything — even the virtual worlds we navigate daily.

I started realising that relationships are often a blend of opposites. My own relationships, whether with friends or family, thrive on this balance. Take my childhood memories: my Ammi’s soft approach was all about love and warmth, a classic Yin. Meanwhile, Abbu had that no-excuses vibe, the Yang, always keeping us on track. They complemented each other, and it was this ‘symbiosis’ that helped me feel secure, even if I only understood it years later.

In romantic relationships, embracing Yin and Yang has shown me that balance isn’t about ‘winning’ or ‘changing’ the other person — it’s about understanding and appreciating what each person brings to the table. If one is the practical planner and the other’s the dreamer, it’s about letting each side shine.

Relationships flourish not when we’re identical but when we allow each other’s unique qualities to complete the picture. So, if you’re the calmer one, embrace your partner’s spark; if you’re the fiery one, find strength in their peace.

At the end of the day, relationships are a dance of differences, where harmony comes from giving and taking, adjusting and learning, and sometimes just letting things be. The lesson is to let go of the urge to change your partner and instead celebrate the balance they bring to your life. And who knows? Maybe it’s that balance, that perfect Yin and Yang, that will help love grow deeper, stronger and, most importantly, lasting.

The writer is an ex-serviceman and a freelancer. He can be reached at shaafayzia@gmail.com