The patriarchal privilege

Gender inequality is a global phenomenon, deeply rooted in many Asian societies, which is inextricably linked to gender-based violence with subsequent serious mental and physical health effects. Male entitlement and privilege is also deep rooted in our society. It offers men a ‘free pass’ to do anything and get out scot-free and it doesn’t take long for these men to ride high on their power and mistreat a woman or those who they think are weaker than them.

Statistics show that violent crimes against women and girls are quite prevalent in Pakistan. According to the Human Rights Commission of Pakistan, 22,000 rapes have been reported in the last six years, out of which only 77 have seen convictions. And these are just the reported ones; there are thousands of cases that go unreported.

UN Women global figures of violent crimes against women reveal that ‘an estimated 736 million women – almost one in three – have been subjected to physical and/or sexual intimate partner violence, non-partner sexual violence, or both at least once in their life (30 per cent of women aged 15 and older). This figure does not include sexual harassment.’ The UN Women data also stated that ‘137 women are killed by a member of their family every day. Women make up for 82 per cent of all victims of homicide perpetrated exclusively by an intimate partner.’

Over the last five years since 2017, at least three women doctors in different medical institutes have allegedly committed suicide by hanging themselves from the ceiling fans in their hostel rooms. Dr Naila Rind committed suicide in 2017 in Hyderabad; Dr Nimrita Amarta Maher Chandani committed suicide in her hostel room in Larkana in 2019; Dr Nosheen Kazmi was found hanging from the ceiling fan in her hostel room in Larkana in 2020. The investigations in the deaths of Dr Nosheen and Dr Nimrita changed course when their families refused to accept the suicide verdict. And later similar DNA samples were found in both cases. In February 2021, Dr Parveen Rind from Nawabshah was saved from becoming another victim when she managed to escape and tell the world about what women students living in medical hostels in Sindh are facing. From her report, it seems there is a network of influential people within the institutes that not only protect but encourage women students to be targeted. She revealed that she was imprisoned, beaten, and tortured because she would not follow the ‘directives’ of these people.

After all this, when you hear that a guilty man who has blatantly confessed, is still not being prosecuted. It becomes quite obvious that the male entitlement and privilege has come into play. On July 20 2021, 27-year-old Noor Mukadam was brutally murdered at the hands of Zahir Jaffer. There was a huge outcry when the news surfaced. Along with the grieving family, sympathisers and activists took to the streets to protest to take severe action against the accused. Zahir tried to use his family’s influence to get away from prosecution, but, fortunately, he was caught in time and put on trial. According to the police report, Jaffer had confessed to murdering Noor because she had rejected his marriage proposal. But ever since his court appearances and trial, his story keeps changing. Media report states that she tried to escape six times. She would have been alive but Zahir, who took her life, is doing everything in his power to preserve his own. He tried all kinds of antics to get exonerated by the court. He screamed at the judge; pretended to be disoriented and unable to comprehend the proceedings; challenged and questioned points raised in court using his legal knowledge as reference. And as if that was not enough he feigned illness, mental and physical, to be given medical care. Fortunately, the verdict came out against the accused, and he was given death sentence for the murder of Noor.

Another case that stunned the nation was the murder of Qandeel Baloch – Pakistan’s first social media star in 2016. Muhammad Wasim, Qandeel’s brother, had confessed to strangling her to death as she brought ‘shame’ to the family. In February 2022, the murderer was acquitted by Lahore High Court. The acquittal of Qandeel’s brother came as a shock for many people, especially for women of Pakistan. Many are afraid that this acquittal will set another precedent for murderers to continue to use ‘honour’ as an excuse for murder.

Jaffer and Wasim are just two examples of how many men feel entitled and comfortable to confessing murdering another person and still expect justice in their favour. It does not help that the society is misogynistic, supporting and encouraging gender superiority and in a way providing them protection to even get away with murder.

Commenting on the murders of Qandeel Baloch and Noor Mukadam, Sobia Rahman, Masters in Women’s Studies from Karachi University, highlights, “Whether it is Qandeel Baloch or Noor Mukadam, the facts have always been right in front of the public. There are evidence and confessions linking these men directly to the crime, and yet the possibility of these men walking free in the society is completely outrageous and reflects on how poorly the justice system works. Not just that, it is making our society more unsafe than ever. It is scary to think that these young women were killed because they made their own choice in their life.”

“We live in a country, where women are ‘allowed’ to make their own choices unless that choice goes against the approval of their families, partners, and society. It is already established that women will always be treated as objects or property; we are trophies which are allowed to study, to work, and flourish as long as we are maintaining the servitude to our families. Honour killings blatantly prove that a woman is not her own person. Male entitlement or privilege begins from how we as a society observe things and come to conclusions. This is everything wrong here today, male entitlement does not start when – the justice system fails, it starts from how our society judges,” she adds.

In the murders of Qandeel, Noor or the motorway rape case, the public had already judged the victim before the perpetrator. So in many ways, our justice system is an echo chamber of how we think. We immediately and instinctively focus on the background of the victims, their career, their clothes or their whereabouts to formulate their characters. But our first go-to thought is never to focus on the perpetrator whenever such crimes against women are highlighted. “We never question the perpetrator on his background, on his job, on his character, or on his mental health. I think one of the reasons we do not question or reflect like that is because subconsciously we protect the male privilege and our deep-rooted patriarchal values. We see such injustices we do not even advocate for them beyond our keyboards,” states Rahman.

Looking from the psychological point of view, Zainab Ali, an associate clinical psychologist and an educationist, observes, “Cases like Zahir Jaffer, which is followed by masses, can trigger vicarious trauma and grief especially for those who identify with the characteristics of victim such as gender. That’s why the fate of these cases is pivotal in establishing women’s sense of security because when they get to learn about a situation where they don’t see a resolution, they may begin to experience helplessness for themselves as well.”

Talking about the other psychological reactions she says, “It could be anger, hyper-vigilance, excessive state of worrying, lack of trust, emotional outbursts so on and so forth. The cycle of grief and unresolved trauma can continue to impact generations for instance, a mother who had been told to not talk about abuse may shush her daughter likewise. The perceived loss of control over the situation explains why victims tend to remain passive in an abusive toxic relationship and exhibit difficulty in learning to stop the abuse. A supportive environment however, can aid in healing the damage and reconstructing healthier beliefs about self and society.”

With the increase in violent crimes in Pakistan, it is clear that laws are not enough to control the situation. The government and society need to take steps that change the way our society treats the different genders, giving more power to women and transgender and not allowing people like Zahir Jaffer and Muhammad Wasim from getting away for taking someone’s life no matter what.

Society must understand murder is a serious crime and nothing more or less, and there isn’t anything honourable about it. At this time, Pakistan especially the women are depending on the judiciary to ensure that Noor Mukadam gets justice, so they can feel they are equal citizens of this country and more importantly are safe.

Finally, justice has prevailed. On 24th February, 2022, Zahir Jaffer was sentenced to death in murder case of Noor Mukadam.