My brother is keeping bad company
Dear Guru,
I am a 16-year-old boy. I am studying in O Levels in a prestigious school. I belong to a middle class, educated family. My father is a banker. He earns pretty well and we live decently. My problem is related to my older brother, K, who is 18 years old and is a student of A Levels. Actually, K is not serious about his studies and he spends most of his time with his friends. There is no one who can watch his activities as our mother took divorce from our father about a year ago. It was a traumatic experience for both of us. I was very close to my mother so it was very shocking for me but now I am pretty okay, but my brother reacted in a different manner. He found escape in partying and fooling around with girls. Our house is now run by servants as our father is busy in his office and cannot devote much time to us. Our grandparents are not alive so there is no one to watch over us. Guru, of late I have noticed that K has become friends with street boys. A few days ago I caught him smoking cigarettes and watching adult movies with those scoundrels in his room while our father was in his office. My brother has threatened me not to tell our father. K is very hot tempered and I am kind of afraid of him. I know what K is doing is not right but I am also reluctant in telling my father about it. What if he gets really angry? Should I tell my father about his indecent activities? I am very disturbed mentally. What should I do, Guru?
Little Brother
Dear Little Brother,
I really appreciate your concern for your big brother. It is really unfortunate that in these important years when you need your mother the most, she is not around for you guys; she probably had very good reasons for getting divorced. In any divorce case, children suffer the most. I wish you people had not been left at the mercy of servants. Your father, on the other hand, cannot sit at home, as he has to run the house and with long working hours it is not possible for him to watch you guys. If your grandparents were alive they would have kept an eye on K’s comings and goings. That’s why it is a blessing to have some elder person in the house. As for your problem, I advise you to talk to your father about K. You should not be afraid of him. He is in A Levels and these are his crucial years of studies. If he neglects his studies and wastes his time with his friends - doing all sorts of rubbish activities - then there are bleak chances of K having a bright future. If you are sincere with your brother, you must take your father into confidence. He should know what his older son is up to. Let your father deal with him. He is working hard to give you guys quality education and his hard earned money should not be wasted. I think K also needs counselling. Actually he is also mentally disturbed and with proper counselling and guidance, K will realise his mistakes and will pay attention to his studies. Good luck!
I am bit over weight
Salam Guru,
I am a 13-year-old boy. I am studying in a prestigious school. My family is quite well off. Guru, my problem is that I am fond of eating and cannot resist good food like pizza and burger. Since I am my parents’ only son, they pamper me a lot and never stop me from eating my desired food. Of late, I have gained quite a few pounds and girls in my class ignore me. They are friendly with me as I treat them quite often but they don’t take interest in me otherwise. Guru, I want them to like me not because of my money but because of me. I think I have to lose weight to look good and then girls will be attracted to me. I am a bit lazy, too, and exercise is not my cup of tea.
Chubby Boy
Dear Chubby Boy,
Don’t be so lazy, dear. Excess of weight can make you unhealthy, so you should be concerned about your health - not girls - at your age. Shake your laziness and start exercising, or at least go for walk which is an effective way of losing weight. Whatever you do, you need to be persistent, and should control your diet. Try to cut down on fatty and oily stuff like fried chips, sodas, chocolates, burgers, pizza, etc, and make it a habit to take balanced diet which includes bits of everything like protein, calcium, vitamins and carbohydrates. You can easily control your weight since you are young and at this age metabolism works very fast. At this age, you should concentrate on studies. Good luck!
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