Son: Well, you did say it was my lunch money!
Pupil: Yes, the cow ate all the grass!
Pupil: No, I got them all wrong by myself!
A large company, feeling it was time for a shake-up, hired a new CEO.
The new boss was determined to demonstrate his decision-making ability and wanted to immediately take action to rid the company of all slackers.
On a tour of the facilities, the CEO noticed a guy leaning on a wall. The room was full of workers and he wanted to let them know that he meant business.
He walked up to that guy and asked, “How much money do you make a week?”
A little surprised, the young man looked at him and replied, “I make $300 a week. Why?”
The CEO then handed the guy $1,600 in cash and screamed, “Here’s four weeks’ pay. Now get the hell outta here and don’t come back.”
Feeling pretty good about himself, the CEO looked around the room and asked, “Does anyone want to tell me what that goofball did here?”
From across the room came a voice, “He’s a delivery guy from Domino’s Pizza.”
A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson in logic.
“Here is the situation,” she said. “A man is standing on a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yelling for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows he can’t swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?”
A girl raised her hand and said, “To withdraw all his money from his savings account?”
Compiled by Usama Rasheed
