Kip Conlon (@kipconlon): Holding a grudge only robs you of precious moments that could be spent plotting revenge....
* Jonathan Edward Durham (@thisone0verhere): A dating app but it’s just one picture of someone’s bookshelves, one of their usual grocery haul, one of their pets, and one their thermostat.
* Kip Conlon (@kipconlon): Holding a grudge only robs you of precious moments that could be spent plotting revenge.
* Scott W (@jswtreeman): If it wasn’t for my North Florida accent and lack of acting skills, I could absolutely be the next James Bond.
* Destry (@DestryBrod): Was there an episode of Friends where they paid rent?
* Andy Van Slyke (@im_all_id): Asking AI how I can monetize my pessimism.
* Andrew Nadeau (@TheAndrewNadeau): Whenever I feel lonely, I just remember I’m filled with millions of particles of microplastics and I’m their whole world.
A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question.
The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimeters from a shop window.
For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, “Look mate, don’t ever do that again. You scared the daylight out of me!”
The passenger apologized and said, “I didn’t realize that a little tap would scare you so much.”
The driver replied, “Sorry, it’s not really your fault. I only just started working as a cab driver – I’ve been driving a funeral van for the last 25 years”.
“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe.” – Albert Einstein
