Do you believe that I am thinking about this in a logical way? I don’t want my parents to think that it is just a passing fancy....
Should I express my feelings?
Dear Guru,
I am a 25-year-old graduate who has recently joined the IT industry as a trainee, in Karachi.
A few months ago, I went to Rawalpindi with a close friend of mine. He introduced me to his uncle's family, where I had the chance to meet his cousin. We spent time together, had interesting conversations, and ate dinner with the family.
During this time, I couldn't help but notice the strong connection I felt with my friend's cousin. Over the past six months, we have been texting each other every day, and it seems like she might have developed similar feelings for me.
Now, Guru, I have reached a point where I feel the need to express my feelings to her and explore the possibility of taking our relationship to the next level. I am aware that this decision is not one that can be be taken lightly, and it will take time and effort to convince my parents that she is the right choice for me. However, I believe that if they come to know and like her family, they will not object to our relationship.
Do you believe that I am thinking about this in a logical way? I don’t want my parents to think that it is just a passing fancy. Guru, I want to know your thoughts on this and any advice you may have to offer.
Guy in Love
Dear Guy in Love,
It's important to understand that text conversations, while helpful in building a connection, may not provide a complete understanding of someone as a life partner. You met her only once, and to truly know more about her life, family, ambitions, and personality, it's essential to meet her few times in person. This will give you the opportunity to see how well you both connect on a deeper level. By meeting the girl and her family, you will find out whether you are compatible with her or not. You will also be able to judge whether your family and hers share basic values or not. It is also important that your parents meet the girl and her family as well.
Love is a strong emotion, but for a relationship to succeed, compatibility is equally important in the long run. Take the time to understand her aspirations, her outlook on life, and her family's values. Similarly, open up and share your own hopes and dreams with her, allowing both of you to make informed decisions.
Considering that you live in different cities, it might be challenging to visit frequently. In this case, it's crucial to make the most out of the visits you can manage. Try to arrange a couple of meetings where you and your families can interact. This will help them understand each other.
Once you are fully satisfied with these interactions and are confident that you have a deep understanding of her and her family, it would be an appropriate to consider taking the next step. Remember that the decision to propose is a significant one and should not be rushed into. Take your time to ensure that you are making an informed choice that will lead to a successful relationship.
Good Luck!
