The local Sheriff was interviewing a blonde for the post of deputy sheriff. He asks her, “Okay, what is 1 and 1?” “Eleven”, she replies....
COMIC RELEF
The local Sheriff was interviewing a blonde for the post of deputy sheriff. He asks her, “Okay, what is 1 and 1?” “Eleven”, she replies.
The Sheriff says, “That’s not what I wanted, but okay! Tell me, what two days of the week begin with the letter T?” “Today and tomorrow,” replies the blonde. The Sheriff accepts the answer because it had not even occurred to him.
“Now, listen carefully. Who killed Abe Lincoln?” he asks. The blonde looks a little surprised. She thinks really hard for a minute and finally admits, “I don’t know.”
“Well, why don’t you go home and work on that one for a while?”
So, the blonde wanders over to the beauty parlour, where her pals are waiting to hear the results of the interview. The blonde was exultant. “The interview went great!” she says. “First day on the job and I'm already working on a murder case!”
What's the easiest way to remember your wife's birthday?
Forget it once!
What do George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and Christopher Columbus all have in common?
They were all born on holidays.
What goes up and never comes down?
Your age!
Were any famous men born on your birthday?
No, only little babies.
What's the best way to get a man to remember your anniversary?
Get married on his birthday.
How does Moby Dick celebrate his birthday?
He has a whale of a party!
What was the average age of a cave man?
Stone Age!
Where do you find a birthday present for a cat?
In a cat-alogue!
A woman called her husband during the day and asked him to pick up some organic vegetables and fruit for that night's dinner on his way home. The husband arrived at the store and began to search all over for organic vegetables before finally going to the produce guy.
The husband said, "These vegies and fruits are for my wife. Have they been sprayed with poisonous chemicals?"
"No, sir, you will have to do that yourself," replied the produce guy.
