‘I’m sick of all these conferences. I always say the same things over and over!’
Einstein had to speak at a conference. On the way there, he tells his driver that looks a bit like him:
‘I’m sick of all these conferences. I always say the same things over and over!’
The driver agrees: ‘You’re right. As your driver, I attended all of them, and even though I don’t know anything about science, I could give the conference in your place.’
‘That’s a great idea!’ says Einstein. ‘Let’s switch places then!’
So they switch clothes and as soon as they arrive, the driver dressed as Einstein goes on stage and starts giving the usual speech, while the real Einstein, dressed as the car driver, attends it.
But in the crowd, there is one scientist who wants to impress everyone and thinks of a very difficult question to ask Einstein, hoping he won’t be able to respond. So this guy stands up and interrupts the conference by posing his very difficult question. The whole room goes silent, holding their breath, waiting for the response.
The driver looks at him, dead in the eye, and says:
‘Sir, your question is so easy to answer that I’m going to let my driver reply to it for me.’
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, ‘This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.’
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, ‘Which do you want, son?’ The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
‘What did I tell you?’ said the barber. ‘That kid never learns!’
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream parlour.
‘Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?’
The boy licked his cone and replied:
‘Because the day I take the dollar the game is over!’
