A boy scout says to his scout leader, ‘Sir, is this snake poisonous?’ The scout leader says...
COMIC RELIEF
* My IQ test results came back. They were negative.
* Why can’t you trust an atom? Because they make up literally everything.
* Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven eight nine.
* What do you call a hippie’s wife? Mississippi.
* What’s the difference between an outlaw and an in-law? Outlaws are wanted.
* Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with a slow Internet connection to see who they really are.
* I never knew what happiness was until I got married—and then it was too late.
* Some men say they don’t wear their wedding band because it cuts off circulation. Well, that’s the point, isn’t it?
A boy scout says to his scout leader, ‘Sir, is this snake poisonous?’ The scout leader says, ‘No, that snake’s not poisonous at all.’ The boy picks up the snake, which bites him and the boy starts to spasm and foam at the mouth as the other kids look on in horror...
The scout leader says, ‘That snake is venomous. Poison is ingested or absorbed, while venom is injected. Let’s get it right next time, boys!’
A blonde and a redhead have a ranch. They have just lost their bull. The women need to buy another, but only have $500. The redhead tells the blonde, ‘I will go to the market and see if I can find one for under that amount. If I can, I will send you a telegram.’ She goes to the market and finds one for $499. Having only one dollar left, she goes to the telegraph office and finds out that it costs one dollar per word. She is stumped on how to tell the blonde to bring the truck and trailer. Finally, she tells the telegraph operator to send the word ‘comfortable’. Skeptical, the operator asks, ‘How will she know to come with the trailer from just that word?’ The redhead replies, ‘She’s a blonde so she is slow and will read: come for ta bull.
