Who is conspiring to make you a failure? Perhaps, nobody. But mostly all prefer to blame the world and never their own selves for any failures attending their lives. This is the easiest route to take to quell and satisfy the irritatingly repetitive inner person, who keeps whispering to us, to the contrary. We silence the inner voice through false sense of belief that I have done the best; but there is denial from others to accept my performance. To augment this misplaced train of thought, a citation is made of having been dealt with injustice arising out of bias relating to caste, color, creed, sect, religion, race, etc. All misplaced. This prototype reaction of all the young and middle age struggling executives is the norm. There is disdainful refusal to see that the world at large doesn’t even know you, let alone it should unilaterally decide to take up arms against your potential. But then succumbing to natural human instinct, it is atleast satisfying to have an object as a punching bag, in which is deposited all personal failures. This false repository is a prized asset of those whose singular reaction to setbacks is to blame other.
Who is conspiring to make you a failure? Perhaps, nobody. But mostly all prefer to blame the world and never their own selves for any failures attending their lives. This is the easiest route to take to quell and satisfy the irritatingly repetitive inner person, who keeps whispering to us, to the contrary. We silence the inner voice through false sense of belief that I have done the best; but there is denial from others to accept my performance. To augment this misplaced train of thought, a citation is made of having been dealt with injustice arising out of bias relating to caste, color, creed, sect, religion, race, etc. All misplaced. This prototype reaction of all the young and middle age struggling executives is the norm. There is disdainful refusal to see that the world at large doesn’t even know you, let alone it should unilaterally decide to take up arms against your potential. But then succumbing to natural human instinct, it is atleast satisfying to have an object as a punching bag, in which is deposited all personal failures. This false repository is a prized asset of those whose singular reaction to setbacks is to blame other.
It is a rarity to see positivity in negativity. Little is realized that success, of any form and type, is actually encompassed within the wraps of many failures. To get to the nucleus of success, the onion layers of challenges have to be peeled, one after the other. We in everyday common parlance, when faced with a setback or even failure react and say, “It must have happened for the better”. This is such a powerful statement to make, but since it is made without “faith” and “conviction” that is essentially an inherent part that underlies the remark, it renders itself to be just an acknowledgment of having failed. If any believes sincerely that a particular event couldn’t be had because it was for the better, the assertion acquires a motivational status. The quest for better is upgraded instinctively; here failure becomes a stepping stone. Most successful people are those who learn quickly the art of converting a current failure into a future success.
Success can never be had with a single ignition, neither is failure defeated with a switch off button. Perseverance is the only key to overcome the impediments and obstacles on the pathway of one’s life, for achieving the ‘desired success’.
In reaction to his son, who was vociferously lamenting the complete burn down due to inextinguishable fire, of his laboratory, Thomas Edison convinced and consoled his son, that this event would allow him to start afresh and possibly look at his research from a newer and different perspective -- and within four weeks of a complete rout of his work of decades, he successfully sent the first phonograph across the Atlantic! That’s what I call positive belief.
Failure is mostly about wanting to cross the bridge before arriving at it; this leads to lamentation before the hurt has happened. No single event is sufficient evidence for either success or failure. Every event has its own story of uniqueness. Failure, undoubtedly is the best teacher of success. The vulgar person inside us only keeps a score-card of “misses” and rarely of “hits”.
Since schooldays, we have been writing and quoting upon, the adage, “blessing in disguise”. But not all of us react positively when in the midst of the “disguised event”; we mostly fall apart with an exclamatory, “why me”?. Numerous events in our lives are blessings in disguise, they infact are mostly milestones or turning points in our lives. A blessing in disguise event that occurs as per our desires is rarely appreciated as a concept; it is largely in the realm of the event not happening, that we seek its cover. The non-inclusion in any sport’s team; the loss in elections, the missing of an A-grade by a whisker, the rejection for a job sought or to be superseded by a peer in getting recognition, are either blamed upon the world or are conveniently given the umbrella of blessing in disguise; depending upon our respective orientation. We mostly react with remarks, “I failed to make it….”; rarely do we hear a statement like, “there is something better for me, waiting…”. Even those who say such to the “failed person”, do so as a matter of sympathy, than any real faith, that its occurrence actually is a positive happening.
Those blessed with unflinching faith that everything happens and moves in accordance with divine orders, are individuals who will have within them the ability to convert eventually all failures into success. The relationship with the Supreme Power is based on a well understood belief strategy that all failures can be converted into achievements. Failure is an orphan; it has no friends, either. It resides in isolation. Failure is part of life. Even transitory success is in effect a failure. Success has to be about its sustainability. Have now, gone tomorrow, is painful. Never Say Die. Never lose your effort, till you find, what you seek. Failure alone must ignite passion for success. Making peace with failure and acceptance thereof, with will to take correct action, is first step on the ladder of success. Failures, upon hindsight will sound most interesting than success. It is the bitterness of failure that propels to taste the sweetness of success. Every single setback produces an encomium of possibilities that lie in wait for exploit.
It is noteworthy to see that failure must prompt a dispassionate review of the quality of effort, there is something wrong with the effort itself is an assurance that you would do better the next time. Failure is not meant to emasculate the seeds of action. Only those should be framed as failures that believe that there is no need to try or persevere.
“Every adversity, every failure, every heartache carries within it the seed of an equal or greater benefit” (Napoleon Hill). Let no failure infuse negativity in behavior. Solitary incarceration for decades did not make Nelson Mandela a negative person. Upon his release his first reaction was to forgive his tormentors. Later as President, he showed and displayed magnanimity towards all, with no exceptions or distinction of any bias or prejudice. A failure considered for many years found success of endurance. The best and valuable pearl is confined within the hardest shell. To procure the glistening pearl of success we have to belabor and do hard work to break open the shell. In the current days of the unprecedented pandemic, where organization are resorting to layoff’s; it is best attitude to see this as great motivators and inspiration to seek out better placement. Unfortunately, the scaling down from comfort zone of status quo to challenge is seen by few as experiencing the failure. This is not a proper attitude to adopt.
Making mistakes is an assurance that one would eventually achieve. Failure would remain subservient to success, where the effort is to dominate our reactions to setbacks with a view of thought that is connected to an unlimited reservoir of Positivity.
The inability to distinguish between the fine lines demarcating happiness and success, leads us to believe, we are facing failure. Success can never be happiness, in isolation; however happiness can be success. Attempt must be made to clear the mind of this dense fog of confusion and smudged thinking. Befriend the environment around yourself. Look at colleagues as your supporters not adversaries. In harmonizing our thoughts in such direction, we in effect control our minds that may beguile us towards a plane of thought, that no good, should be expected from co-workers. The adoption of attitude will depend if one has to face obstacles or impetus, in achieving success and surmounting potential failures.
In conclusion therefore there are really no demons of conspiring individuals, who wish to make you a failure; if it is so, the solution to undo resides within you. Invade your mind with lethal dosage of hope, expectancy of good and positive thinking; it is inevitable that you would emerge victorious, successful and failure will be laid to eternal rest.
The writer is a senior banker and a freelance columnist
