Selena Gomez knows the internet can be a ruthless place, but even with her signature “kill ‘em with kindness” attitude, she admits that some of the negativity occasionally gets to her—especially when it comes to comments about her weight.
“I fall victim to looking at things,” she shared during a joint appearance with her fiancé Benny Blanco on the On Purpose with Jay Shetty podcast on March 24.
“It doesn’t add anything to your life. It’s just so difficult from the choices, the people you date. It’s like nobody cares about that stuff with men.”
The Only Murders in the Building star, 32, has always been open about her weight fluctuations due to her lupus diagnosis, but that hasn’t stopped people from making unsolicited comments about her body.
And while she’s learned to clap back when necessary, she admits the scrutiny does take a toll.
“My weight’s a big one too,” she continued.
“Everybody just has something to say, and it’s really making me sad. Not even sad—no I’m not a victim—but I think it’s made me a tad bitter. And I feel really guilty for saying that. But it’s true.”
Gomez acknowledged that women in the public eye face an entirely different level of judgment.
“This isn’t news to anybody that women have a lot more intense feelings from their appearance, to what they are wearing, to everything,” she said.
“When I get prepared for an event, 90 percent of the time I’m saying, ‘I just hope I can take the picture and sit down.’”
And beyond the beauty standards, she’s also dealt with the pressure of not fitting into a specific identity box.
“It’s the character that gets judged. It’s the way I’m not white enough,” she explained.
“I’m not Mexican enough. There’s just so many different things that come up in my face that I just can’t help but see. I fall victim to looking at things. It doesn’t add anything to your life.”
So how does she deal with it all? Simple—she logs off.
“I’m just happier that I don’t have that. I had to stop after a while. And I still take breaks because I’m human and sometimes I read things,” she admitted.
“But I do most of the time ignore everything. I don’t have anything on my phone at that moment. So, there are ways to combat it.”
One thing that has helped her navigate the noise? Love—and she’s getting plenty of that from Benny Blanco, who proposed in December after a year of dating.
“He’s the one person, you know when you’re saying those nice things to me babe, I believe him,” she said sweetly.
“To where I’m not going to believe someone who is blowing smoke up my butt to just make me feel good. He’s saying it because he believes it, and that makes me feel good.”
In a world full of critics, it looks like Selena has found a safe space where she can simply be herself.
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