Comic Relief
* Jimmy Fallon (jimmyfallon): Watching a movie on the plane? No thanks. Watching my seatmate’s movie with no audio and not understanding what’s going on for over an hour? Yassss.
* Terri Paella Piñata (terrip38): Home is where your phone doesn’t ask for the Wi-Fi password.
* Andy Van Slyke (im_all_id): Very rude that image quality improved exponentially as I became worse looking
* Maddie (MadHatterMommy): Trying to write a joke about a bad vacuum cleaner that doesn’t suck.
* Hollie Harris (allholls): My 13yo told me we’re never truly alone, because we’re always carrying 2 1/2 pounds of fungi, bacteria, and mites on our bodies at all times. And I’ve never wanted to forget something so badly before in my life.
Riddle me this…
Q: Why did Adele cross the road?
A: To say hello from the other side.
Q: What kind of concert only costs 45 cents?
A: A 50 Cent concert featuring Nickelback.
Q: What did Jay-Z call his wife before they were married?
A: Feyoncé
Q: Why did the singer climb a ladder?
A: She wanted to reach the high notes.
Q: What types of songs do planets sing?
A; Nep-tunes.
Q: What type of music are balloons afraid of?
A: Pop music.
Q: How do you fix a broken tuba?
A: With a tuba glue.
Q: Why did the fish make such a good musician?
A: He knew his scales.
“I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar, but I cherish the friend who for me does not consult his calendar.”
– Robert Brault